About a million years ago, I ran a 5K with a friend Back East. Being from Colorado, I had the benefit of training in altitude and while it was my first ever “race,” three miles at sea level was not intimidating. On the day however, I found myself winded within the first mile, or at least that’s …

My ten year old’s body thinks it has a neuromuscular disorder. His nerves pretend to be confused so they don’t fire to his muscles properly. His calves have shriveled and his feet have curled to the point they needed surgical intervention. That’s what we’ve been doing this summer; a surgery in which they broke his …

Let’s be brutally honest. Whatever gossip-worthy egregious behavior your coworker is displaying, whatever glaring Marco-Polo-your-bestie-worthy inconsideration your ex is performing, whatever outrage you’re reading on social about the idiots tit for tatting, wildly judging each other all while insisting that what their side is doing isn’t judgement, whatever bone crushingly unsupportive comment or stance your grandfather, or cousin or your …

This picture speaks words seldom spoken. They are hard to verbalize, and when they find voice, they often land soundlessly like a butterfly on a bear. One might suppose these men are rude, inconsiderate, unconscious even. They aren’t, not in the slightest. And yet, here we are. Me squashed in between, careful not to take …

Several years ago, I drove down a road framed with multicolored autumn trees as sun splashed over the windshield of my PT Cruiser. I had rationalized buying this car new, but from day one it reeked of buyer’s remorse with its bright red confidence, and car payment I couldn’t at the time afford. On the radio an …

It never occurred to me to think past my wedding day. I didn’t consider how long marriage lasted. At least I couldn’t have because if I had, wouldn’t I have rolled some ideas around in my head, like, does this person have interests similar to mine? Is he affectionate? Does he get up early or …

Many of my clients are women likely to be seen scaling the side of burning buildings in three-inch pumps, throwing the traumatized on their backs and tossing turkey sandwiches on Rye to firefighters as she goes. It’s often a topic of discussion in our sessions how the habits and tools that led to their current achievements, are not …

“I hope I don’t eat one of those,” my aunt said one night at dinner nodding toward a glistening plate of baked potatoes. Currently, I’m hoping I don’t eat the Costco bag of chocolate covered berries my husband hid from me behind a stack of shirts in his closet. But I have a long history with hope that’s less playful, more dangerous …

“The reality is…” This is how our first dog trainer, Elinor, who we paid just shy of one thousand dollars, started every sentence. Whether answering when Enzo will behave well enough to go to a dog park, how to get him to stop jumping or what to feed him, the answer started with “The reality is…” The reality …

I’ve been flirting my whole life. When I was young, I flirted with tall, aloof, disinterested boys who (god-willing) didn’t notice I was flirting at all. For all I know, the flirting existed in my head, but regardless, the image of me testing the waters of my worthiness in another’s eyes resulted in cringing myself …

The Pandemic Puppy we purchased as what we needed to get through COVID and “the last thing I’ll ever ask for Mom, I swear,” has delivered misery in equal measures to joy. Enzo only wants to pee and poo leash-free, on his own property. The designer-priced trainer we engaged (as though the bastard mutt were …

Yesterday I got sucked in. A couple of conversations, a little bit of news and before I knew it, my brain was bogged down in feeling judged, judging others and in a state of overall irritation, otherwise known as stress. With the fear that’s plaguing so many of us lately, I thought it might be …

The other day I was chatting with an old graduate school friend who has been a therapist for the last twenty some years. Despite all her experience, she was seething with a resentment. I was able to coach her out of it, and she suggested I share the story as she found it useful. Without all the deets, here’s what happened. My …

With everything happening in the world right now, I thought it would be helpful to remember what the real crisis is. Disturbing, sometimes even unimaginable things will happen in our lives. However, those are not the emergencies. The real crisis is when our internal state has wandered from peace, calm and serenity into worry, fear, …

I seriously considered ending this blog here. I mean, need I say more? Remember the one rule we learn when we’re little: “If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”? I’ve always wondered why no one told us to apply this to what we say to ourselves. It would be one thing if what …